«A Clockwork Orange»

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She was a real horrorshow devotchka, this
nurse, with a very red rot and like long lashes over her glazzies, and under
her like very stiff uniform you could viddy she had very horrorshow
groodies. So I said to her: "What gives, O my little sister? Come thou and
have a nice lay-down with your malenky droog in this bed." But the slovos
didn't come out horrorshow at all, it being as though my rot was all
stiffened up, and I could feel with my yahzick that some of my zoobies were
no longer there. But this nurse like jumped and dropped her book on the
floor and said:
"Oh, you've recovered consciousness."
That was like a big rotful for a malenky ptitsa like her, and I tried
to say so, but the slovos came out only like er er er. She ittied off and
left me on my oddy knocky, and I could viddy now that I was in a malenky
room of my own, not in one of these long wards like I had been in as a very
little malchick, full of coughing dying starry vecks all around to make you
want to get well and fit again. It had been like diphtheria I had had then,
O my brothers.
It was like now as though I could not hold to being conscious all that
long, because I was like asleep again almost right away, very skorry, but in
a minoota or two I was sure that this nurse ptitsa had come back and had
brought chellovecks in white coats with her and they were viddying me very
frowning and going hm hm hm at Your Humble Narrator. And with them I was
sure there was the old charles from the Staja govoreeting: "Oh my son, my
son," breathing a like very stale von of whisky on to me and then saying:
"But I would not stay, oh no. I could not in no wise subscribe to what those
bratchnies are going to do to other poor prestoopnicks. O I got out and am
preaching sermons now about it all, my little beloved son in J. C."
I woke up again later on and who should I viddy there round the bed but
the three from whose flat I had jumped out, namely D. B. da Silva and
Something Something Rubinstein and Z. Dolin. "Friend," one of these vecks
was saying, but I could not viddy, or slooshy horrorshow which one, "friend,
little friend," this goloss was saying, "the people are on fire with
indignation. You have killed those horrible boastful villains' chances of
re-election. They will go and will go for ever and ever. You have served
Liberty well." I tried to say:
"If I had died it would have been even better for you political
bratchnies, would it not, pretending and treacherous droogs as you are." But
all that came out was er er er. Then one of these three seemed to hold out a
lot of bits cut from gazettas and what I could viddy was a horrible picture
of me all krovvy on a stretcher being carried off and I seemed to like
remember a kind of a popping of lights which must have been photographer
vecks.